so happy,

honestly, i have had the most remarkable weekend.

friday night,

i was at my sister's house.

we had a very sincere heart to heart.

and i learned things about myself.

that i needed to change.

saturday was crappy.
besides spending time with an amazing friend.

then saturday night ended badly.

sunday, i was numb.

very unhappy after church.

because church was uplifting for my spirit.

but i was very unhappy after,

as you can tell by my previous post.

my uncle richard,

an amazing man that i'm glad to know,

spoke to me about some things.

my belief of myself?

that in order to have friends,

i have to be humble.

in order for me to be humble,

i put myself down.

we described the word humble.

vulnerability, openness, and not hiding.

i was doing the opposite.

not telling people about me.

being enclosed, not showing myself.

so by trying to be humble, i was being the opposite.

i was looking at myself as a piece of crap.

when that's not true.

then on monday, my eyes opened further.

about relationships, and what is true and whatnot.

but even my uncle told me about myself and relationships.

i like to have a lot of people like me,

and choose which one i like best.

instead of dating a lot of people and finding out who i like.

monday, a certain person told me to date around.

date a lot of people.

which i don't do,

usually, because of my fear of rejection.

that i'm not pretty enough.

but changing my view on myself,

i asked four people on dates today.

and do you know what was amazing?

they all said yes.

which is something i didn't expect.

tonight?

for mutual, we listened to the missionaries.

and what they like, dislike, whatnot.

question answer, basically.

it was very enlightening.

and i realized that i will miss people.

when they leave on their missions.

more than i thought.

and then i went to deseret book with someone i love.

i bought a new CTR ring.

and a book, called I KNEW YOU COULD!

the book has so much meaning...

i recommend it to you.

and that certain person i love?

bought me a picture of a little girl,

holding the hand of jesus,

and under the picture, it says

'i feel the savior's love',

and she told me to study it.

while looking at it, i almost cried.

my spirit was very powerful for me tonight.

i missed that feeling.

and i'm very happy right now,

because life is looking different for me.

yesterday was the first day of that.

what day was it?

march seventh, two thousand eleven.

711. those numbers mean so much to me.

i'll tell you the significance later.

because this post is too long.

but it's the beginning to a new chapter in my life.

one that i believe you will all enjoy. (:

(random, but today, i beat solitaire in ninety-six seconds. a record.)