realizing you have a problem.

isn't what we all want it to be.

i expected something different.

and i'll be going against everything i usually say...

when i say this.

i won't win.

i'm not prettier than her.

there's something about her that will win you over.

there is no chance for me.

i will keep my head up,

and keep the hope...

but i don't think it'll make a difference.

i will just have my heart broken.

be rejected once again, as always.

trying to change myself,

and having this smack me in the face,

is something that stops me in my tracks.

if it goes wrong, why keep going.

why try and make a difference.

why do something worth remembering.

i shouldn't be jealous.

but i am...

and after talking about someone else's relationship,

i realized how much ours is like theirs,

and why aren't you following your own advice.

right now, my moods are highly varied.

or completely neutral.

there's nothing here.

i'm just a shell of a person.

trying to find my place in this world.

because i have no idea what i'm doing.

and i don't know what you're doing.

i need to stop thinking so much.

i need to just do whatever i want to do.

and i need to stop caring so much what people think.

and i need to start accepting compliments,

not pushing them away.

there are so many things i need to do.

and i know i need to do them.

but the first step to starting over,

is realizing you have a problem.

now i just need help to fix it...