the song of a love bird.

i love this song.

fall, go on and fall apart.

fall into these arms of mine,

i'll catch you.

every time you fall,

go on and lose it all.

every doubt,

every fear,

every worry, every tear.

i'm right here.

baby, fall.

sing it to me.

<3

it's not easy being green.

well, i haven't written here for a while.

sorry about that.

a few things have happened.

i'm hoping to get a job at a restaurant soon.

work there all the time,

save up,

buy a car,

get a laptop,

move out,

learn how to live on my own.

because it's not too fun here, when you're trying to be an adult.

i just need a job.

something to keep me occupied.

because i don't have money for school, so...

yeah.

besides that, i've found this site.

it's called tinychat.

i have met some pretty amazing people.

from all around the world.

i spend a lot of time on there.

pretty popular, if you ask me.

but, it doesn't help my confidence.

oh well.

i miss my high school friends.

every day.

but i don't really make an effort to see them,

because i feel like i can't.

so disappointing...

ugh.

all of my sisters are going to be here for christmas this year.

i'm so excited.

i have been cleaning houses to get money,

so i'll be able to buy a few things.

but other than that,

i don't think i'm giving much.

and i'm not getting a lot, either.

which i don't mind.

i would rather see everyone and enjoy my time with them,

then worry about the presents.

christmas always makes me warm and gushy inside.

i love chubbs.

that is all.

peace out girl scout. (:

i swear

this always effin' happens to me.

since when

did you like skanks?

tissues.

crying for four hours straight.

someone stop me.

dale johnson.

a substitute teacher that was at my high school

for my entire high school career.

he was one of the nicest guys i knew.

whenever a teacher was gone,

everyone would say,

"i hope we get dale!"

he was one of the sweetest guys.

amazing. wonderful.

love love loved him.

he'll be very missed.

rip.

who's not dead.
oh well, dedication to him.
people who start rumors are cruel and terrible.
i literally cried over this man,
and he's still living.
i'm wonderfully happy that he's still around.
but whoever started that rumor...
you're :P

100th post in 2011.

so i just watched this movie called 

'something borrowed',

and it was incredible.

very good movie.

but what caught me the most...

was how i related to the main character.

i'm always doing what other people want.

i can't say no.

and i'm one of those people that go,

"oh, he's too good looking for me."

so i'll direct him to one of my friends or away from me,

despite my feelings.

and then i'm just feeling like i don't have any friends right now.

with this whole haunted house deal,

i'm busy every night.

and to begin with, i hate making plans.

i'm socially awkward and i'm almost never comfortable.

home-body extraordinaire.

and i don't feel emotionally ready for any type of commitment.

i feel that i'm at a moment that i really need to find myself...

the problem is that i don't really have the time to do so.

i just wish things could be different.

i wish i could be a different person.

that's what i've been wishing for at 11:11 recently.

while i'm laying in my bed at the haunted house.

and this is the only way i can let out my feelings.

because i don't have anyone to talk to

that won't judge me on my life.

or talk more about themselves than about me.

as selfish as that sounds,

i want someone that i can talk to about me.

instead of listening to all of their problems,

and whatever.

that's why i write blogs.

this blog can't talk back about itself,

and it just listens to me.

i really want to see the lion king in theaters.

but i have a feeling i won't be able to.

just my luck.

bye.