romancing the stone.

as you all probably know,

i role play.

i explained it already, so i don't need to.

but it's just interesting to me.

i have four boy characters and one girl.

it's easier for me to play men.

because i know how i want them to be.

and how i don't want them to be.

the girl is just like me, pretty much.

with the same insecurities and quirks.

but she's prettier.

anyways.

all of my boy characters have a girl that they're with.

two of them are in love.

one is married, and the other just proposed.

i know i'll sound crazy.

but their thoughts are completely different from mine.

i'll be walking around my house,

and something reminds me of them.

or if someone says something,

i'll have different responses from my characters in my head.

they're all completely different people.

even if they all reside in my head, they're different.

all the movies, people i've met, songs i've listened to...

that's where they come from.

and it's interesting for me when they're in love.

i'm pretty sure i don't know what love is.

no, i'm positive i don't.

never felt it.

i've seen it, but it's not like you can learn from that.

love is something you have to feel to believe.

i could become a hermit and hate on love.

but i don't.

anyways.

it's weird for my two guy characters to be in love.

and have their thoughts of the ones they love,

lingering in my mind.

it's amazing how they think of them.

it makes me jealous.

i want someone to think of me that way.

alright, call me crazy.

that's just so mind blowing to me.

how i don't know what love is, but they do.

anyways. 

i'm done confiding in you.

i'm going camping soon.

wee!